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A thankful heart is what we all want, right? It’s what we *should* strive for. An attitude of gratitude, thankfulness and enjoyment. But let’s be real, there are times when it feels like our thankful spirit exited the picture. So, what do you do then?

It’s like having a major character leave abruptly in a television series. The steady character who was a constant pillar, maybe not the star of the show but always there. Suddenly they disappear and the show continues on, but somehow it feels hollow and empty. That’s what it’s like when we are living our lives and suddenly our thankful heart walks out the back door.

I’ve been there, thinking of the 10 000 things I should’ve been thankful for and feeling wearing instead of joyful. For every thing I was glad about, there was a string attached to it.

I was thankful for healthy children but with that health came boundless energy that exhausted me.

I was thankful for a house to call home but with that home came cleaning.

I was thankful for a fridge full of food but with that fridge came cooking (and more cleaning).

I was thankful for a safe country but with that safety came expenses to keep it that way.

Where did my gratitude go? The real heart-felt thanksgiving for all the things I had?

We all experience times like this, sometimes more so during motherhood I think.

When our hours are not paid for, our children rarely say thanks and the jobs we do are on repeat…gratitude is the last thing on our minds.

So how do we have a thankful heart when this is how we feel?

A Thankful Heart is an Understanding Heart

When we know that our lives have seasons, we understand that what we are experiencing today may change next week. When we understand who God is and how He operates, we know that summoning thanksgiving might be difficult while in a season of grief or pain.

God doesn’t expect us to feel gratitude when we really need His comfort. He understands our emotions and wants us to seek Him through every feeling.

You can still seek God even if you aren’t in a grateful state of mind. He doesn’t ask that we only come before Him if we are happy. He asks that we come before Him regardless of how we feel.

Jesus likely wasn’t focusing on thanksgiving while in the garden of Gethsemane (Matthew 36:38-39) and I don’t think God expected Him to be grateful at that time either. It was a time of sorrow and anguish.

Sometimes our thankful hearts take a backseat to the programming while we handle other situations. God understands this, so long as we continue to follow His plans and understand there is a time for things. Our gratitude will return, we just have to trust God during the times of frustration, irritation or difficulty.

Once we lean on Him, He will give us what we need, which likely is rest.

A Thankful Heart is a Rested Heart

Let’s be real, because God asks we be real. He doesn’t ask for fake smiles and prayers we don’t mean. If it is thanksgiving you are lacking, don’t pretend like you are grateful.

Time and time again we see in the Bible where the author calls out to God, bares their soul to Him in an effort to understand their situation.

I have a deep love for the book of Psalms because of this reason. It reminds us about our humanity and the fears we face, but also is an example of how to face these fears, by giving them to God!

The action of taking God’s yoke upon us is meant to give us relief, to give us rest. We are supposed to hand our burdens to God and replace them with His teaching, His gentleness and His love. God wants to give us rest. It is much easier to feel thankful when you feel rested.

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.

Matthew 11:28-30

A Thankful Heart is a Hopeful Heart

If you still find yourself struggling, remember that God is a God of hope as well as rest. You may not feel thankful because you may have forgotten to seek God’s hope.

Hope is a strong motivator. If you watch movies you’ll know it is often an element that motivates characters. It keeps them going. They may have been in a situation where they couldn’t feel thankful, but they could be hopeful.

And while our lives aren’t movies, they aren’t scripted, we don’t have stunt doubles or a director telling us where to stand and how to talk, the feelings portrayed in films are examples of what we experience in real life.

So while we may feel like our thankful heart exited stage right, it might mean that we need a hopeful heart to step in its place.

Gratitude for God’s Hope

After you have sought God, His plans, His rest and His hope, you may start to feel your gratitude returning. Or you may not and you may continue to sit in the comfort of the Lord Most High until you feel your heart turn back to thankfulness.

God cares about you regardless of how you feel. He promises to protect you, to love you and lead you in the way everlasting. Trust His promises and will for your life. On the days when you are struggling to find a thankful heart, remember who He is, the rest He has to offer and the hope He is for our lives!