What sort of guidelines or rules do you have in your home? These are 5 habits for a Christian household that will help build peace, harmony and love within your space!

When it comes to building a Christian home, with a family rooted in Christ, sometimes we need to think about the rules, or guidelines we want to follow.

They should be biblical (you can read about the biblical truths my home is built on HERE), but sometimes we need phrases we can say to remind our families how we should behave.

Why Rules Are Important

I’m going to let you in on a little secret, I’m a bit of a rule breaker. I know, I know, as a former teacher I should be good at following rules. But in reality, I’m better at making my own rules than following someone else’s.

I have found this helpful when it comes to my home because I have been able to create rules based on what the Bible says, but also what my family needs. The areas where I see my children struggle or know we need guidelines, those are the kinds of rules I’ve put in place.

These are important in our walk with God. Children need rules, they need boundaries and they need to know you will hold the line. Our Heavenly Father does this for us, He makes things clear in the Bible how we should act. And if we cross the line, He will let us know.

We need to do the same for our children. To raise them in God’s love is to raise them understanding how He wants us to live. Our actions, words, thoughts and habits should be shaped by God’s love, grace and righteousness.

These are the rules and phrases I use in my Christian household that have helped my children grow in faith and as children of God!

5 Habits for a Christian Household

Build One Another Up

“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.”

Ephesians 4:29

We all can have a tendency to get frustrated with the people we spend every waking moment with. Siblings are a perfect example of this. My boys are together from the moment they wake up, until they go to bed (unless it’s a school day). And this means that sometimes their words sound like two people who are tired of being around one another.

There are harsh words, angry words, snatching and grabbing and just overall unpleasant behaviour. The kind of behaviour that only encourages retaliation and eventually arguments. Nothing can be built in that kind of environment!

We can’t build homes on shaky foundations and children can’t build one another up in situations of frustration.

That’s why I encourage my boys to choose words and actions that will build each other up. It’s okay to have an opinion, to feel upset or to voice a concern but there is a way to do it that encourages discussion and growth instead of fostering anger and division.

It’s not an easy lesson to learn, I know it will be something I say on repeat for years to come. But it is a phrase we use, a rule we have because that’s how God wants us to act towards each other and when we practice it in our home, I know my boys will be better at it with their friends and eventually with their own family.

If You Make a Mistake, Own It

“Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off your old self with its practices.”

Colossians 3:9

This is a hard one for kids. They make mistakes, they break something or hurt someone and they want to hide it. Just as Adam and Eve wanted to hide their sin.

I tell my boys, “If you made a mistake, own it. I may not know, but God does.”

It takes them a minute to gather courage but this helps them to tell the truth.

I always congratulate them and remind them that while telling the truth can be hard, being caught in a lie will be worse.

The LORD detests lying lips, but he delights in people who are trustworthy.

Proverbs 12:22

It’s also important to learn what to do when you make a mistake. I want my kids to know they can come to me, to figure out a solution, even if it’s hard. That’s why we “own it.” We take responsibility for our actions and mistakes and learn from them.

We aren’t perfect, and God knows our hearts, but He still wants us to be honest. That’s why in my Christian household we encourage honesty and stepping up when we make mistakes.

Ask for Forgiveness & Forgive When Asked

Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.

Ephesians 4:32

After we make a mistakes, we need to ask forgiveness. But then, if we are wronged, we also need to give that forgiveness too.

It’s a two way street in a Christian household. You can’t seek forgiveness but then not forgive others.

Families get plenty of practice seeking forgiveness and offering forgiveness. And what a good place to practice, because we can talk about how God loved us enough to forgive our sins through Jesus Christ.

Our children can watch as we forgive them, and sometimes they have to forgive us too! There have been times when I’ve made mistakes, forgotten something or had to apologize to my boys. It’s good for them to learn what it feels like to be on both ends of the forgiveness stick and to understand that when we say “sorry,” we should mean it.

Choose Joy

This is something I say frequently to my kids.

“Are you choosing joy?”

There is a difference between joy and happiness (read more about how happiness is a feeling and joy is a way of living HERE). Happiness is fleeting and can be taken away easily. Joy on the other hand is rooted deeply in our souls.

Sometimes we have to choose it, we have to look past the moment and see the goodness in our lives but the more we practice that, the more we see God.

God is our joy, in trying times and good times. So when we choose joy, we choose God. So I remind my kids of this when they are grumpy. If we’ve exhausted all the ideas and they still are moping around I say.

“Okay, now is the time to choose joy, because I can’t make you happy.”

I want my home to be a joyful place, but not because I make it that way. I want it to be joyful because God is the centre of it. So even when we feel frustrated or bored, we know that the undercurrent is joy and contentment that comes from the Great Comforter; our Heavenly Father.

We Serve the Lord

“As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.”

I say this verse to my children whenever we talk about why we don’t watch certain things, use certain decorations or engage in certain activities.

Especially around Halloween, I tell my kids we don’t decorate with anything related to fear because God tells us not to be afraid! (I do fall/harvest decor but nothing spooky).

We serve God in our home. That means everything we do, say and think should be worthy of Him. If Jesus was sitting next to us on the couch, would he be happy with what we are watching or how we are playing?

This is all part of serving God in our homes. As our children practice in the safety of our home, they are gaining experience for their future homes and families. They learn what it means to serve God even when no one is watching.

If you want to cover your home in more prayer and be the prayer warrior for your space, grab my 30 day guide “Pray Over Your Home.” It’s filled with scriptures, prayers and encouragement as you dedicate your space to God and seek His wisdom, direction and plan for your family. Start praying today so your home is covered tomorrow!

Habits for Your Home

Having rules for a Christian household is more than writing them on a sign and hanging it on the wall. It’s giving your family the structure it needs to grow in grace and love. Especially if you use Bible verses or stories when talking about these rules.

This is the foundation for a Christian home centred on God. It shows love and compassion, joy and hope in all that you do. It reminds your children that God gives all that we need, whether it’s patience, forgiveness or peace.

Rules can be hard to follow, sometimes its better to call them guidelines or habits because when we think of it as something we live by because it helps us in our walk with God, it doesn’t feel so restrictive. We don’t want a home that is stiff and unwelcoming, we want laughter and peace to fill our walls.

The next time your children quarrel or sigh with longing because they are bored, remind them you are a Christian family and have habits for a Christian household that make the space better for everyone. Infuse your family with love, peace and harmony as you instil those Christian habits into your home!