The light at the end of the potty training tunnel is a scented candle. Potty training is stinky, there is no other way to describe it and you will need room freshener! It’s worth it though, all the accidents and misses, extra laundry and tears…it does amount to something.

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I remember with my oldest getting over the “hump” was hard. There was the initial excitement and “we can do this” sentiment but that quickly faded.

Soon there were tears and disagreements, so many disagreements. And while we steadily improved on going on the potty, identifying the need to go was a struggle.

Notice I’m saying “we?” It was heavily reliant on me, mom, to indicate it was potty time and then make it happen. I was okay with that because learning to self-initiate takes time. Even as adults we sometimes have to be told to stop what we are doing and go pee!

The Potty Training Tunnel Isn’t Straight

One thing I was reminded of back then was that the learning curve is not linear. It’s all over the place. With potty training there are successes and then days when you think you may as well go back to diapers.

There are a few days that stick out for me, when E was screaming while sitting on the potty and I just sat beside him and hugged him. 20 minutes of this until he finally was able to release, while our supper sat on the table getting cold. A frustrating memory.

My second son was a different story entirely. He was older when we started but seemed to take things more in stride. He understood the purpose of the potty and was able to self-initiate and do things by himself.

We still had accidents and struggles, especially around a “stinky” but I knew this was normal and would take a little more time to understand the difference between a fart and a poop.

But overall my second son caught on to potty training much quicker, which was a relief for me.

Potty Train in a Way That Works for You

Another thing I learned was you can read all the books, blog posts and information there is but potty training has to work for you and your family.

A few days after starting with my oldest we decided to move. Yes, almost a split-second decision when I said “Baby number 2 is coming and this house isn’t going to cut it, let’s sell!”

No book will recommend you try to sell a house and potty train at the same time. You can’t potty train a kid while in other people’s houses (it’s heavily frowned upon). We also had to leave our house for a week so showings could be done and we didn’t have to clean up every day to make our house presentable (and not smell like pee).

That’s what we did though. The little potty came with us and E would pee in the truck in a Walmart parking lot or the doctor’s office parking lot, (with Mama standing in the rain beside him encouraging him). And he wore “special underwear” (pullups) for those trips just to be safe.

We made it work because it had to be done and it needed to fit into our schedule, the way we were living.

The same with my second son. He wore “special underwear” over top a pair of regular underwear for trips to the bus stop or to pick up bananas because we had eaten them all. The pull up came home wet the first few times but slowly he learned how to hold it.

Take Breaks!

Most books encourage you to start and don’t look back. But I found it helpful (in the beginning) to take breaks. To put the pull up on my kid, take him outside and let him forget for a while about the potty. It helped my boys and it helped me.

An hour or two of running around isn’t going to regress them back to diapers and when you get back inside you go back to underwear and running for the little toilet. The mental break seemed to help them be more aware and willing to sit on the potty again.

So take those breaks if you need them. No one will ask your 18-year-old in a job interview how fast they potty trained!

Laugh About It

We had so many accidents with my oldest…mostly just him sitting on the potty and missing the bowl completely and hitting the floor, or his pants or everything. I didn’t know it was possible to pee in the space between the seat and the toilet but you can soak your pants and the floor if you do it right.

I just had to laugh.

The first time B peed on the floor with underwear he was so shocked he didn’t know what to do.

I just had to laugh!

We also talked a lot about animals during the process. “You’re waddling like a penguin, so quick like a bunny run to the potty!” It seemed to make things a little more fun and E started to say he was walking like a penguin and needed to poop.

When we laughed about things or kept them lighthearted it made potty training a more positive experience.

It also helps if you have a new toy or book for your child, something they can do while sitting on the potty. Here are some of our favourites!

Progress is Progress

In the end, progress is progress. There will be days of struggle and days of triumph, it takes time but you will get there.

We sold/bought/moved and had dozens of doctor appointments and E didn’t have any regressions until baby B was born and even that was small and easily remedied.

I often wonder if Jesus had to potty trained and how that went. Did Mary get frustrated with the messes and constant chasing after a messy toddler or was He an easy kid who transitioned without problem?

I guess we’ll never know. We just have to love our children through each stage, including this one!

If you’re potty training, have courage, it does get better! There are days when it doesn’t feel worth it but if you push through you will have success. Stay positive and keep encouraging your child. The pride they have when they are successful is worth it.

Not only that but saving on diapers is also worth it! If you know parents who are potty training, just laugh along with them in their messes and successes. But fear not, there will be a day when potty training is behind you and it’s Superman (or dinosaurs or trucks or princesses or flowers) underwear forever!